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"MAN! You go through life, you try to be nice to people... you reist the urge to PUNCH them in the FACE, and for what? All so some pimply little PUKE can treat you like dirt, cause your'e not on the TEAM! Well I'm better than dirt! ...well most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt, that stuff's loaded with nutrients, I can't compete with that..." -Moe

Now he's after me again. Here's why:
What i did to piss this person off was being accomplice to a message into the afternoon messages at school.
Thing is, he thinks it was me that did this, and it wasn't. I just sat back and laughed

Here's what it said.

quote:

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(victim) To see Mr (Teacher) this afternoon for his private tutoring in D4.

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Sounds innocent enough doesn't it?
Well this teacher is a bit "queer". That's what makes it so funny. People who don't know the teacher don't see the big deal about the message.

and abotu fighting people bigger than you, i know all about this. there are many things you can do to prepare. first, buy a swiss army knife with a locking saw arm. not a knife, the saw. you shove one of those in someones face, and they will leave you alone. second, buy a cup, you can never ever be too careful. third, wear some heavy clothes, it helps to soften any blows against you. 4th, if they are bigger than you, dont ever be afraid to hit them in the nuts, if you do it right, no matter how big they are, they will fall. 5th, make sure you dont get into a fight where you dont have room to run in case you start to lose. 6th, if you have any large amounts of cash hanging around, find someone bigger than this big person, and pay him to wait around the corner, and when the big person comes to hit you, the other guy can step out and just kick his ass. 7th, and most important, whatever you do, do not throw the first punch, and make sure you have witnesses. if he manages to cause any serious harm, then you can sue his ass for all he is worth, because anything you may have done to him will be purely out of self defense. finally, if you win, make sure he knows you can do it again.

also, the mandible claw is a nice maneuver....but thats not really advice...

I've been doing jiu jitsu for just a couple of months and i'm not really that strong at all but its shown even me how easy it is to floor someone and if the situation gets a bit out of hand even break the odd wrist or arm without much fuss, and trust me if he ends up using a knife of even just a baseball bat you can quite happily do the above without fear of getting charged with GBH

You dont need to be Bruce Lee to be able to protect yourself and its boosted my confidence loads and half of these things is about phycology so if he thinks you mean business he's going to be unsure and hesitant

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"there'll be time for explanations later... and hopefully some sex" - Ace Rimmer

This message has been edited by Dark Knight Bob on November 21, 2000 at 07:55 AM

quote:

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Originally posted by Dark Knight Bob:
I've been doing jiu jitsu...

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You learned jiu jitsu? Whoa.

Sorry, couldn't resist.

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A good programmer is someone who looks both ways on a one-way street

Remember, (at least in my opinion) the key to winning a fight is controlling the fear factor. If someone is bigger than you, they feel more confident because...well, is it not obvious? So you need to tip the scales in your favor. So,

1. DO NOT be meek. Talk trash. Talk shit. Tell the guy you are going to fuck him up beyond belief. Make up stories about other people "twice his size" that you've trashed. Even if he kicks your ass, I promise he'll do it with more hesitation than if you said, "leave me alone." Playing the pacifist will just egg him on.
   
2. ALWAYS look him in the eye. This shows your confidence. Never let him stare you down. Keep a bead on him at all times and frown slightly. If he asks, "what the hell are you staring at," muster up some balls and reply, "I'm going to fuck you up" in your angriest, confident voice...I PROMISE you will see positive results.
   
3. If it gets down to it, be on your toes...literally. Stand with a bouncy posture on the balls of your feet, and learn to dodge and duck (start jumping rope today - I swear, it helps). Also, never take your eyes off of his eyes. Watch the punches with your peripheral.
   
4. I suggest using the "Bruce Lee" punch. Jab as strait as possible with an open palm. Then, right before you make contact, squeeze a tight fist. Brass knuckles may help, but unless you want to go to jail, stick with quarters. Start practicing with a punching bag. Or a tree (get used to the pain, punching someone hard hurts your hand pretty bad.)
   
5. If you have a clear shot, or when he's least expecting it, use the cup of your palm made by the inside of your thumb, up to your index finger. Jam this into his larynx. When he goes down, make sure you hit him square in the nose, just to watch his eyes well up.
   
6. If he's too tall, go for the solorplexes. They're at the middle of the chest, right below of the sternum, where the ribcage meets. If you hit it, he loses his wind. Then you are free to go berserk. Try this out on your friends. It may need practice.
   
7. If this isn't a fight, and more of a wrestling match, there is only one thing you can do: BITE. And do it hard. Draw blood. He'll be freaked and stunned, and then you can go for his balls, neck, nose, etc.
   

Remember, for legal and strategic reasons, always be on the defensive. But never, ever, back down.

edit: formatting...but while I'm at it, I'll just mention that many a small man has scared off a giant. Just think of the sterotypical situation: the small crime boss and his big goons. Why is this so commonplace? Because of attitude. Your body language, psycho factor, intelligence, and aura of manipulation can lead you to control the minds of many. Hitler was no Wermacht. He was a tiny peice of shit. But look how many massive German beefcakes he had kissing his filthy ass.

This message has been edited by whiskey@throttle on November 21, 2000 at 10:39 AM

quote:

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Originally posted by Observer:
You learned jiu jitsu? Whoa.

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I know Kung Fu!

Well, not really, but I am a black belt in Shotokan Karate, and my advice is: Don't get into these situations in the first place. There really isn't any good reason for provoking a person into fighting you. At least, not in any civilized society: if you are younger than 13-14, of course, fights are going to be a simply fact of life. In which case studying Martial Arts will indeed help you, just as it helped me. But if you're a high school student or older, you should really be mature enough to solve problems in ways other than violence. I know that sounds like a cliche or some preachy moral statement, but it's true. There are very few situations where attacking someone will do any good, unless there was nothing you could have done to avoid the fight.