While entering Stomper's hotel room on 3rd day of trip, cocky SOB (who unfortunately is one of Stomper's roomies) decides to ambush people entering the room. Cocky SOB is about 5'9", 150lbs. Thinks he's hot shit. Cocky SOB ambushes person entering room before Stomper by shooting him with large water pistol in groin, making it look like he pissed himself. Ha ha. Very funny. Person before tells SOB to go fuck himself and advises him not to shoot Stomper with watergun. SOB agrees, Stomper enters room covering groin (just in case).

SOB promptly shoots Stomper in the eyes with Silly String from about 2 feet away. Silly String does not have time to solidify, and is thus still in quasi-liquid form when it enters Stomper's eyes. In addition, Stomper wears contact lenses. Therefore, Stomper is now in great pain and quite enraged.

Stomper grabs SOB about the throat with right hand and lifts him off the floor.

Stomper: "That hurt, asshole."

Stomper throws SOB about 15 feet across the room into the wall about 4 feet up. Loud, resounding crash ensues.

Damn, that felt good - both the snapping and the venting. I'm done. Feel free to call me a psycho if you want.

[edit]Whoops - missed an "I". No, I don't know why I wrote that in the third person.[/edit]

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I don't believe in stereotypes. I prefer to hate people on a much more personal level.

This message has been edited by The_Stomper on May 22, 2001 at 10:46 PM

Here's my story, from about 10 years ago. It was my junior year in high school. I'd been harassed most of my years in school for being a "pussy" and a "fag." On this particular day, I was in an exceedingly foul mood, mostly because my first girlfriend had broken up with me the day before.

Enter Ryan Van Slake. He was one of our high school bullies, and you're damn straight I'll post his REAL NAME on the Internet - anyway, I'm waiting in a big crowd at the lunch counter, when he goes "move out of my way, FAG" and tries to push me so he could cut in front of me.

I don't really know what happened next... all I remember is that he flew about 10 feet, actually doing a full turn in the air before he crumpled on the ground and everyone started laughing and throwing shit at him. I somehow wound up crouched down with my arms spread out, and I was actually growling. All this happened in under a second... damn scary.

*note I was 12, 150 pounds (lot's o' fat, lot's o' muscle), and this dude was taller, alot fatter, etc.

quote:

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Originally posted by DeadAnztac:
Pretty funny how I'm a pretty damned calm and inward guy =)

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sounds like you need to be more outwardly aggressive... I mean, if it's between you being a dickhead from time to time, and you going after people with knives...

This message has been edited by DeadAnztac on May 23, 2001 at 05:58 PM

lotsa people used to pick on me in 6th grade. by the end of middle school, id beaten the shit out of all of em at least once, and they were all my bitches.

in 9th grade (first year of high school) one of the kids i used to beat the shit out of stabbed someone in the stomach. i stopped getting into unprovoked fights.

last year, someone punched me in the side, i dropped his ass so hard that he couldnt play his instrument in band. someone tried to squirt water on me, and i wet his pants with the entire bottle. some military bitch stole and destroyed my 75 cent bag of chips, so i kicked his ass, literally. he got up, gave me a really hard right cross to the jaw, and i hurt like a motherfucker, but since ive learned not to show pain, he thought he didnt hurt me and got scared shitless. i still dont provoke fights anymore. but if someone pulls me in, you can be sure im gonna kick their ass.

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It's the pop-o-matic bubble, motherfucker!

This message has been edited by Bozeman on May 23, 2001 at 08:37 PM

first one was in yr 7. had this big italian cunt, with this huge nose, and he was hasslin me during science. i dunno what the fuck happened, but i just snapped and i just punched him square in the nose. blood flowin out of his nose. funniest thing is, my science teach told me to see her at the end of the lesson, and by the time the end of the lesson came, she forgot about it.

the 2nd time was in yr 9.
this dude i know was giving me a hard time, and had actually picked up a chair and pretending to jab it into my face. i pushed the chair down with my left, punched with my right, and got the cunt right in the eye.
my teacher also saw this one.
called us over at the end of the lesson.
went absolutely apeshit at the other dude, then sent him off. he then turned to me, shook my hand, and said "Good punch"
hehehe

the 3rd was also in yr 9, my parents just broke up, and this bastard in my grade thought it'd be funny to say shit about it.

grabbed him by the collar, punched him in the face, pushed him over, and just started kicking him while he was down.
apparently i broke 3 of his ribs, and bruised his whole head pretty badly.

i got off scot free on that since the principal decided i was under "conciderable pressure"

Anyway, the first time I snapped was at the begining of gym class. We were running laps around the basketball court and he pushed me a little. Then did a full body tackle and crumpled him into the bleacher at the side. When I came to my sences I basically just left him there and when back to running laps. Nobody really noticed for some reason...

The second time was after lunch. He kept walking behind me and pushing down on my back pack. Finally I snapped, grabbed his back pack and picked up my feet. We both went flying off to the side of the walkway. After we stood up he did the same thing to me, but on the cement and everybody was like, "AH! He done it on the sment! That's wrong! AH!" (Virginian's talk like that)

The third (I'm not sure if this counts) time while I was walking down the hall he open a lower locker door infront of me and I wasn't paying attention and folded over it. I snapped (and from what my friends tell me) I ran at full speed and threw myself into the lockers 3 or 4 times screaming, "FUCK YOU IN THE BUTT!" Anyway there's still a big dent in them... so that was pretty cool.

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"OH GGOD!!! NOT THE HYLIGHTER AGAIN!!! GO AWAY YOU LITTLE PEANUT HEDGEHOG!!!"
"The only thread about ME likened me to poo shaped mummy."
"Have a nice day, because monkeys don't."
-< PersonGuy >

This message has been edited by PersonGuy on May 24, 2001 at 09:32 AM

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It's not that i'm celibate, it's just i don't give a fuck.

Instead he jumps up, starts to charge at me, and with one mighty *smack* from jim, Brian goes night night.

I have some really good fight stories from when I was in the Corps and we used to go to T.J. Mexico, but I'm afraid if I start telling them, people will flame me for acting macho. I can't win.....

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jim
Beauty is in the eye of the Beer Holder
< Brews and Cues >

quote:

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Originally posted by PersonGuy:
"AH! He done it on the sment! That's wrong! AH!" (Virginian's talk like that)

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we do?

Anyways, i'de be interested in the stories =)

quote:

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Originally posted by jim:
I'm afraid if I start telling them, people will flame me for acting macho. I can't win.....

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war does not make one great, mmmm?

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It's the pop-o-matic bubble, motherfucker!

quote:

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Originally posted by Sithiee:
we do?

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Well... most of you... I lived there for 6 years so I got my sampling. For example:

Man1: Jeet?
{Have you eaten yet?}

Man2: Nah. Joo?
{No I have not yet. Have you eaten yet?}

Man1: Nah. Yontu?
{No I have not yet. Do you want to now?}

Man2: Ite.
{Yes.}

Man1: Sgo!
{Now we depart!}

*at the restraunt*

Server: Chyont?
{What would you like to eat?}

Man2: Howabowda fish?
{I will order the fish if it's good.}

Server: Srite.
{An excelent choice sir.}

Man1: Nuinma. Jusacoke.
{I do not want to order any food. Please bring me a coke to drink.}

*after the meal*

Man1: Redyett?
{Are you ready to leave the restraunt?}

Man2: Yasgo.
{Yes. We should leave.}

Server: Yall combaknow! HEAR!
{Please reture another day! Can you hear me (retorically)?}

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"OH GGOD!!! NOT THE HYLIGHTER AGAIN!!! GO AWAY YOU LITTLE PEANUT HEDGEHOG!!!"
"The only thread about ME likened me to poo shaped mummy."
"Have a nice day, because monkeys don't."
-< PersonGuy >

the last time i directed any sort of violence at anyone, was when some asshole grabbed me by the arm while i was walking home. i bit him in the neck and drew blood. people who think they can fuck with me cause i'm 'just a chick' get a hard reality check. i might take some damage, but i'll be vicious if i hafta

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kuru
'dancing is the vertical expression of horizontal desire.'
-robert frost

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I may be paranoid, but not an Andriod.

so i stand there, and it felt like so fucking horrible. i mean the fucker was about three feet away, and my eye was all red and shit.

so i calmly step out of the showerroom, and dry off, get my clothes on, and go out of the locker room, to this hallway, with a soda machine. i go what the FUCK do you think you're up to. he goes, what the hell are you going to do about it, trying his hardest to look big. he pushes me, does this flailing punch kick jump twist thing, that utterly fails, and i punch him right into the jaw. his head was like maybe six inches from the wall, and then there was a soda machine. so his head hits the wall, then ricochets into the soda machine. this was the best punch i will ever get in my life. i have big hands (width wise) and i got every last little picometer on his face. he started crying and slumped to the ground while i walk back into the locker room.

i am packing up my backpack when this fucking HUGE guy follows me in, he is friends with steve, his name is dustin. he's like 6'3" prolly about 220. he starts to follow me around the locker room, while im slowly backpedaling the whole way. finally we get to a wall, and he ACTUALLY "there are only going to be two hits, me hitting you, and you hitting the ground"

i bust up laughing. i mean its so lame! this kid has like 3/5ths of a brain cell, and he thinks he was just the wittiest person alive for saying that. just as he's about to punch me, this kid steps in to break it up and gets a nice one right on the eye. he was my hero.

so i stand there, and it felt like so fucking horrible. i mean the fucker was about three feet away! my eye was all red and shit.

so i calmly step out of the showerroom, and dry off, get my clothes on, and go out of the locker room, to this hallway, with a soda machine. i go what the FUCK do you think you're up to. he goes, what the hell are you going to do about it, trying his hardest to look big. he pushes me, does this flailing punch kick jump twist thing that utterly fails, and i punch him right into the jaw. his head was like maybe six inches from the wall, and then there was a soda machine. so his head hits the wall, then ricochets into the soda machine. this was the best punch i will ever get in my life. i have big hands (width wise) and i got every last little picometer on his face. he started crying and slumped to the ground while i walk back into the locker room.

i am packing up my backpack when this fucking HUGE guy waltzes in, he is friends with steve, his name is dustin. he's like 6'3" prolly about 220.(pretty big for a 9th grader? think again, he failed twice) he starts to follow me around the locker room, while im slowly backpedaling the whole way. finally we get to a wall, and he ACTUALLY "there are only going to be two hits, me hitting you, and you hitting the ground"

i bust up laughing. i mean its so lame! this kid has like 3/5ths of a brain cell, and he thinks he was just the wittiest person alive for saying that. just as he's about to punch me, this kid steps in to break it up and gets a nice one right on the eye. he was my hero.

dustin got expelled. i got three days out.

edit- i really never knew i could fight/punch, but im glad i have SOME reflexes.

This message has been edited by melk0r on May 26, 2001 at 11:48 AM

quote:

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Originally posted by Rhydant:
the REAL problem here is, why the hell is he reffering to himself in the third person?

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quote:

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Originally posted by The_Stomper:
No, I don't know why I wrote that in the third person.

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I still don't know why... just felt like it, I guess.

And pass me a Pop-tart, would ya?

[Edit] I really do hate that damn UBB quote code. I never can do it right the first time. [/Edit]

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I don't believe in stereotypes. I prefer to hate people on a much more personal level.

This message has been edited by The_Stomper on May 27, 2001 at 09:41 PM