Topic: turn on girl by text
started by: Skol
Posted by Skol on Apr. 08 2002,19:49
Lo guys.I am seriously workin on getting with this girl and we have been sending each other text messages on our fones say what we want to do to each other.
I need ur help to come up with the best txt msg to turn her on. No limits. Just needs to be 160 character max.
Come on guys, I need ur help.
Posted by editor on Apr. 08 2002,19:56
...perhaps it's best if you don't reproduce.
Posted by The_Stomper on Apr. 08 2002,22:08
Try"I like to shove this phone up my ass while it's on vibrate."
That'll get her going right away.
Posted by ic0n0 on Apr. 08 2002,22:35
Send her "ROTF" and "
"
Posted by Dysorderia on Apr. 09 2002,05:19
i've seen houseplants with more intelligence than this guy..
Posted by Beldurin on Apr. 09 2002,05:41
Posted by Dysorderia on Apr. 09 2002,05:51
| Quote (Beldurin @ 09 April 2002,00:41) |
|
nice
Posted by Wiley on Apr. 09 2002,06:26
You compleate m..... hold on ....call waiting *click*
Posted by Wolfguard on Apr. 09 2002,13:31
| Quote (Dysorderia @ 09 April 2002,00:19) |
| i've seen houseplants with more intelligence than this guy.. |
I have seen rocks with more smarts...
Time to call the dispatcher at GPPTF.
Posted by editor on Apr. 09 2002,14:15
Did you tell her that you want to lick her all over yet?
Posted by ic0n0 on Apr. 09 2002,16:03
Tell her you want to bone her in the ass, nothing says loving like ass sex.
Posted by Wiley on Apr. 10 2002,00:50
| Quote (ic0n0 @ 09 April 2002,08:03) |
| ...nothing says loving like ass sex. |
Yeah ....I miss prison
Posted by Beldurin on Apr. 10 2002,03:21
| Quote (Wiley @ 09 April 2002,18:50) | ||
 3-->
Yeah ....I miss prison |
And the award for best use of multiple smilies in a detnet post goes to...
*opens envelope*
Wiley
Come give your speech, dude.
Posted by Wiley on Apr. 10 2002,04:29
Um.... well ...gosh, there's just so many people to thank. I mean, I have to give credit to the guy who invented the smiley ...and then there are the creators of IKonBoard ...and all the multiple smiley posters who went before me who gave me the courage to post multiple smilelys. And, um ...don't start playing the music yet. I love you ...I love you and Tom Cruise ..I love you brother ...I love you all ...everybody!!!
< I Love You All Man!!!!! >
c'mon ...how many people can pull a Cuba Gooding Jr. clip outta their ass for a freaking post?
Posted by Beldurin on Apr. 10 2002,04:36
| Quote (Wiley @ 09 April 2002,22:29) |
| c'mon ...how many people can pull a Cuba Gooding Jr. clip outta their ass for a freaking post? |
You and your damn CBG locked up my f'ing computer...*mutter, mutter, grumble, ic0n0 deserved it more, mutter, racists*
Posted by editor on Apr. 10 2002,04:38
No offense, Mr Wiley, but I'm glad that not many can post Oscar clips for posts...
Posted by veistran on Apr. 10 2002,06:23
yeah, the oscars suck
Posted by editor on Apr. 10 2002,07:12
so what does your name mean?
Posted by ic0n0 on Apr. 10 2002,14:51
I thought i shoulda got it too! 
Posted by Wiley on Apr. 10 2002,15:32
| Quote (Beldurin @ 09 April 2002,20:36) |
| You and your damn CBG locked up my f'ing computer...*mutter, mutter, grumble, ic0n0 deserved it more, mutter, racists* |
Sorry ...shoulda put the disclaimer on there that it's not for little pussy computers.
Posted by ic0n0 on Apr. 10 2002,19:25
Posted by kuru on Apr. 10 2002,20:12
Get her a subscription to www.nifty.org.Then tell her you want to act out the ones in the bestiality section.
Posted by smartsnake on Apr. 10 2002,21:39
Yea nothin gets me turned on more then ones and zeros turned to in letters on a screen 
(/sarcasm)
Posted by BlackFlag on Apr. 12 2002,23:18
"you aer teh secksiist gurl in teh world!!!11 You smell so good i want to lick youre armpit! I want to make love to you IRL... just like teh times we cybered on AOL, excpet no pokemon shit thhis tiem. I want to be wiht you."If that doesn't work at first, keep repeating the message untill she gets a restraining order.
Posted by Beldurin on Apr. 13 2002,03:38
| Quote (BlackFlag @ 12 April 2002,17:18) |
| "you aer teh secksiist gurl in teh world!!!11 You smell so good i want to lick youre armpit! I want to make love to you IRL... just like teh times we cybered on AOL, excpet no pokemon shit thhis tiem. I want to be wiht you." If that doesn't work at first, keep repeating the message untill she gets a restraining order. |
More personal anecdotes from BlackFlag's autobiography: "Huh? And P.S. Jews and Koreans Suck"
Posted by fatalbert on Apr. 13 2002,18:55
| Quote |
| I am seriously workin |
seriously??
a little piece of advice:
take editor's advice, and don't procreate...
and don't try BF's own personal list of favourite pick-up lines...
although they probably work on the type of woman he uses them on...eww
Posted by kuru on Apr. 14 2002,19:45
What works on the type of women that BlackFlag picks up is the $5 he gives them to get in the car with him.
Posted by liquid metal on Apr. 14 2002,23:20
they also get upset when he asks for it back at the end of the night.
Posted by editor on Apr. 14 2002,23:25
Yah, about 20 minutes later...
Posted by kuru on Apr. 15 2002,02:48
20 minutes?From what I hear, it's more like 2 minutes.
Posted by fatalbert on Apr. 15 2002,04:50
that's of course if they take the $5 and get into the car...
Posted by BlackFlag on Apr. 15 2002,12:55
| Quote (kuru @ 14 April 2002,22:48) |
| 20 minutes? From what I hear, it's more like 2 minutes. |
more like 2-3 hours (personal record is 11 hours), but unfortunately you'll never get firsthand knowledge of what i can do. I wouldn't fuck you to save the species.
The rest of you limp dicks can console yourselves with the knowledge that anyone that can last more than 2 minutes is atypical. You're not inferior, just average.
Posted by Rshias on Apr. 15 2002,22:00
| Quote |
| more like 2-3 hours (personal record is 11 hours), but unfortunately you'll never get firsthand knowledge of what i can do. I wouldn't fuck you to save the species. The rest of you limp dicks can console yourselves with the knowledge that anyone that can last more than 2 minutes is atypical. You're not inferior, just average. |
Muhahah! My personal best destroys yours -- 37.8 seconds! It's not instant gratification, but it's getting close!
Posted by kuru on Apr. 16 2002,01:36
You say that like I'd want to fuck you.Where did you ever get that delusion?
Posted by BlackFlag on Apr. 16 2002,01:42
I don't think you'd want to fuck me any more than i'd want to fuck you. All im saying is "your loss, not mine."
Posted by editor on Apr. 16 2002,02:08
Mr Flag, I was just joking around, sorry you took it seriously.I don't hate you, not at all, d00d.
Posted by kuru on Apr. 16 2002,04:25
My loss?hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
(rolling on floor, laughing out loud)
Posted by liquid metal on Apr. 16 2002,19:45
i never realized how bad these two were around each other
Posted by kuru on Apr. 16 2002,20:00
You want 'bad'? Witness Wolf and me in the same geographical location at the same time.It's like an YAEGC. (Yet Another Evil Geniuses Conference).
Posted by fatalbert on May 01 2002,06:26
| Quote (BlackFlag @ 15 April 2002,07:55) |
| more like 2-3 hours (personal record is 11 hours) |
it takes you that long to get hard?
Posted by Beldurin on May 01 2002,07:15
Thanks for reviving a dead thread, asshole. 
Posted by fatalbert on May 02 2002,04:57
hey, I've been away for a while, pillowbiter 
Posted by Beldurin on May 02 2002,05:54
| Quote (fatalbert @ 01 May 2002,22:57) |
| hey, I've been away for a while, pillowbiter |
So long that you forgot how to read a date on a post?