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<º(((><

well i guess i should set this up by saying at my school there is this dance called turnabout. its where the girl asks the guy and pays for everything (about time, eh?). anyway, there was this girl i didnt know at all, lets just call her number 1 . she called me up one night and asked me to the dance. me, knowing that number 2 (the one iknew a little bit) was going to ask me sooner or later, said no. now number 2, i liked a little bit. i met her a while ago, and since then her friends have been "bitching" at me for me to ask her out, etc. well anyway, to cut to the point, she asked me, i said yes, and i have relatively few problems until the day of the dance. so the day comes, im a little bit of a procrastinator, and i just get directions to the girl's house and the time im supposed to be there that day. i'm okay with that though. anyway, i show up at 6 thinking im 30 minutes late. but it turns out that i was supposed to be there at 7:30. lets label that problem 1. now im not about to count problems, because it was a pretty good night, and on top of that, i did like the girl. but what happened after that is just plain fucked up. at the end of the night i made a half-assed attempt to ask her out over the weekend. she answered as if she didnt understand it, but that was okay i guess. moving on, the next week at school (i dont have any classes with her) i ran into her and tried to talk to her. she ran away like a scared little bitch after smiling at me and looking all nice. i guess that can be problem 3. well this happened 2 more times. and at the end of the week a friend of hers comes up to me and tells me i shouldnt ask her out because "she thinks we're too good of friends." now if that isn't the biggest bullshit i've ever heard in my fucking life i dont know what is. and this is another example that has led me to my conclusion: girls in high school dont know what the fuck they want.

good to let that kind of thing get off your back.

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Cheers!

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<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >

quote:

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The "Friend Speech" Rule

According to Leykis 101, when a woman says "I just want to be friends with you" or "Let's not ruin our friendship," basically she means "You will never get into my panties." Similarly, when she says "Let's just be friends first" or "I want to get to know you first," she actually means "Let's not have sex first." It's that simple, baby!

Here's the rationale. A lady will say such things to you if she's not interested in you, because she doesn't want you to lose interest in her. Most women who wouldn't admit this say that they just don't want to hurt your feeling, but that's not the whole story. You can be sure that she does say the same thing to other men, and there are two reasons for this. First, she doesn't want any men to lose interest in her regardless of how she feels about them. Second, by keeping a number of men who are interested in her, she doesn't have to worry about finding another mate if she breaks up with the man she's currently with. In case of a breakup, she'll just have to go down the list and pick another. Therefore, Leykis 101 holds that women are attention whores. They want all the attention they can get.

Men who are included in the "friends" list are those who don't know how to "close the deal." They know they want a woman, but they don't know how to express their feeling to her—let alone how to tell her he wants to get in bed with her. As a result, these men are wiling to settle for the "friend" status, hoping that someday soon he would get lucky with her. Also, when a man is in a lady's list, he is considered secondary. He's a backup. He isn't good enough for her, and she'll pick him only if her relationship with the man she prefers doesn't work out.

How do you know whether a woman that you like considers you as a backup lover? Well, it's simple. A woman would not tell you in detail about the man she's currently with if she's interested in you, because she knows that doing so may cause you to lose interest in her. She knows that it's certainly not a subject you'd like to hear. Therefore, if you feel that a woman is treating you as her personal love counselor, you may suspect a couple of things. First, she may not have interest in you at all. Second, you may be in her list of "friends." In other words, she's telling you "I'm currently sleeping with another man, and you'd have to wait in line--if I ever decide to give you some at all."

In relation to the rule, if you are a female, you should be aware that a man can never become "just friends" with a woman if he is not attracted to her. When a man says to a woman "I want to be your friend" or "Let's just be friends," he basically means "You're so attractive that I want to get into your panties." By becoming friends with a woman, a man generally hopes that someday he'd get lucky and that she'd let him have sex with her.

Likewise, when a man compliments a woman by saying something like "You look beautiful today" or "I like you in that dress," nine out of ten times he actually means "I wonder how you look like with your clothes off." In his mind, that's what he's thinking about. If you're a man, and if you don't admit this, you must be in denial with yourself.

Why some men are willing to be considered by women as "just friends" is also interesting. Men are used to rejection from women, and men know that women don't handle rejection as well as they do. Since women are the ones who usually call the shots, they aren't used to rejection. Therefore, when a man isn't attracted to a woman, he knows he can't just tell her the truth. Instead, he'd lie to her to keep their friendship, because telling her the truth about why he isn't attracted to her--she's ugly, she's fat, she isn't sexy, she has pimples, etc.—would hurt her feeling. In an essence, generally a woman can't be friends with men who honestly express their dislike about her.

In conclusion, there are only four situations where a man can become casual friends (no sex involved) with a lady: (1) when he is not attracted to or interested in sleeping with her, (2) if he's gay, (3) if he's such a loser that he does not mind ending up in her list of "friends," and (4) after he's had sex with her.

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<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >

This message has been edited by PersonGuy on February 10, 2001 at 09:58 PM

Regrding PersonGuy:
Damn, that means I'll never get laid.
Also, that link is dead.

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<º(((><

This message has been edited by TallAssAzn on February 10, 2001 at 11:50 PM

quote:

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Originally posted by TallAssAzn:
Regarding DjSokol:
Also, that link is dead.

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That's so freakin weird! It works PERFECTLY from my Favorites folder, but even if I copy and paste the address it won't load (if I individually try to access the pictures and stuff, they;re all there)!! I guess you chould copy the location, and add a favorite by hand... hrm...

Oh ok... I don't know what's wrong with the frames, but < this link > (to a section of the page) should work fine.

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<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >

quote:

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Originally posted by PersonGuy:
Oh, and for the lazy... I single out the part YOU wanted to read:

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you're not really saying anything i dont know. i know that girls dont really mean it when they say lets just be friends, etc. but, what i dont get is where the sudden change in her mind came from. and the reality of the situation is that istill want to get into her panties

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< http://www.pshosting.com/
>
fast and inexpensive web hosting and domain registration

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<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >

quote:

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Originally posted by PersonGuy:
That's so freakin weird! It works PERFECTLY from my Favorites folder, but even if I copy and paste the address it won't load (if I individually try to access the pictures and stuff, they;re all there)!! I guess you chould copy the location, and add a favorite by hand... hrm...

Oh ok... I don't know what's wrong with the frames, but < this link > (to a section of the page) should work fine.

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No, that's not the correct link. < http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/Terrace/8181/ >

How do I do it? I've got M4d 8r0wzin9 skillz.
Actually no, I searched geocities. H4W!

But I wonder who's the chump here, me or her. I mean, her boyfriend is basically a tyrant - he's always telling her "it's my way or the highway, bitch" but not in so many words.

Anyway, the whole "don't be friends with chicks" crap is just that - crap. Female friends are just as much an available pool of potential mates to guys as male friends are to women.

Hmm...

but of course, men always have to walk around thinking the world owes them something... and when a woman wants to be friends with them, that's somehow a major insult to their integrity...

bah. My male buddies are cool, but Marie is the best friend I've had so far.

quote:

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Originally posted by PersonGuy:
Then the only thing you can do is risk your friendship by telling her that! Otherwise, you've got no other choice but to remain a friend... (oh and if I had to guess, probably some other chick convinced her to tell you that for whatever reason and that's why she changed her mind)

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the thing that im mad about is that we had no friendship! so, basically it was telling me no before i even asked a fucking question, and not only that, but she had the gaul to have one of her friends "spread the word" to me. so, to sum it up, we're not friends, its over.

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< http://www.pshosting.com/
>
fast and inexpensive web hosting and domain registration

quote:

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"I don't want to go out with you. You're too important to me"

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Ok.

quote:

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And has called me at least twice a day

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mmmhmmm.

quote:

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her boyfriend was being an asshole again. Her boyfriend is basically a tyrant - he's always telling her "it's my way or the highway, bitch".

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Yah...

quote:

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the whole "don't be friends with chicks" crap is just that - crap.

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Huh? What the fuck are you talking about? You just PROVED what I said sentence for sentence (you might want to read ALL of Leykis 101 and not just that one section)... EVERYTHING fits PERFECTLY into what I said and applys almost DIRECTLY example to example! She's dating an ASS HOLE... NOT YOU. She discusses her relationships with you because she never expects to be in one with you. She doesn't wanted DATE you (in Leykis 101 dating = porking).

I never said being friends with girls is a bad thing! I have TONS! Just understand that you'll never ever ever get in her pants.

quote:

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But I wonder who's the chump here, me or her.

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YOU, if you think otherwise.

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<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >

quote:

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Originally posted by Chrissy:
Ok now its time for a girl to get in on this. I want you boys to know that I told my current boyfriend that i just wanted to be friends because that is what I wanted. However just because you say you want to be friends with someone doesnt necessarily imply that that is all it is ever going to be. In fact I would say about 90\% of the guys I was "just friends" with eventually became my boyfriends and not because someone said to me "why dont you date him" it was because in time I felt like I wanted to make that jump.

I have about 4 close guy friends who I would never ever consider becoming intimate with because they mean too much to me yes. In addition they arent the kinds of guys I want to be with in that way (they are more like big brother types to me- even thou we are all the same age- maybe one year apart) So just because a girl says that she wants to be "just friends" doesnt mean that it will always be that way. And just because you are close to a girl doesnt mean that "just friends" thing is a crock of shit.

Women arent as hard to understand as you think. We mean what we say for the most part. Also just because a woman says she attracted to you doesnt necessarily mean that she wants to be with you like that either.

It goes both ways

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reading the product of a girls mind i just have one thing to say - contradiction city

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< http://www.pshosting.com/
>
fast and inexpensive web hosting and domain registration

quote:

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Originally posted by Chrissy:
Ok now its time for a girl to get in on this. I want you boys to know that I told my current boyfriend that i just wanted to be friends because that is what I wanted. However just because you say you want to be friends with someone doesnt necessarily imply that that is all it is ever going to be. In fact I would say about 90\% of the guys I was "just friends" with eventually became my boyfriends and not because someone said to me "why dont you date him" it was because in time I felt like I wanted to make that jump.

I have about 4 close guy friends who I would never ever consider becoming intimate with because they mean too much to me yes. In addition they arent the kinds of guys I want to be with in that way (they are more like big brother types to me- even thou we are all the same age- maybe one year apart) So just because a girl says that she wants to be "just friends" doesnt mean that it will always be that way. And just because you are close to a girl doesnt mean that "just friends" thing is a crock of shit.

Women arent as hard to understand as you think. We mean what we say for the most part. Also just because a woman says she attracted to you doesnt necessarily mean that she wants to be with you like that either.

It goes both ways

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reading the product of a girls mind i just have one thing to say - contradiction city

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< http://www.pshosting.com/
>
fast and inexpensive web hosting and domain registration

I believe Chrissy. But then, I also know that women can expect guys to pick up on non-verbals as well. In fact, sometimes they will shut off all verbal communication, but be barraging you with 'Subtle' hints... which guys are incapable of detecting.

I think as you start going back to younger girls, the too important of a friend thing is more often a crock... and that's probably what the girls that are being referred to are. It becomes more plausible after you hit 18, 20, 25?

i think its best summed up in: the key to getting your feelings across is communicating with simple one syllable words, and no hidden meanings.

quote:

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i think its best summed up in: the key to getting your feelings across is communicating with simple one syllable words, and no hidden meanings.[/B]

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Let's fuck.

Leykis was about getting in the pants.

quote:

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Originally posted by solid:
Leykis was...

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IS... IS! He's not going away any time soon, baby!

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<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >

I have about 4 close guy friends who I would never ever consider becoming intimate with because they mean too much to me yes. In addition they arent the kinds of guys I want to be with in that way (they are more like big brother types to me- even thou we are all the same age- maybe one year apart) So just because a girl says that she wants to be "just friends" doesnt mean that it will always be that way. And just because you are close to a girl doesnt mean that "just friends" thing is a crock of shit.

Women arent as hard to understand as you think. We mean what we say for the most part. Also just because a woman says she attracted to you doesnt necessarily mean that she wants to be with you like that either.

It goes both ways

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"I ated the purple berries...they tasted like burning"

quote:

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Originally posted by Chrissy:
I would say about 90\% of the guys I was "just friends" with eventually became my boyfriends and not because someone said to me "why dont you date him" it was because in time I felt like I wanted to make that jump...I have about 4 close guy friends who I would never ever consider becoming intimate with because they mean too much to me yes. In addition they arent the kinds of guys I want to be with in that way (they are more like big brother types to me- even thou we are all the same age- maybe one year apart)

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I'll bet the difference between the guys who became your boyfriends and the ones who you would never ever become intimate with is ROMANCE - some guys who fall for a woman friend will sketch themselves out and try like hell to NOT show that they like the woman, and other guys will just like her and not worry too much about it. Personally, I've shown up with flowers & chocolate, leave love notes on her car, call her late at night just to say "I miss you," tell her it's her special nite and she gets to eat wherever she wants; she's been known to show up at my work with cookies that have "my name is [my name] and I rule!" on them - things like that.

I'm not saying "see, we're gonna wind up together" or anything, I honestly don't know - but - the point is that the guys who are permanently resigned to the "just friends" category won't do things like that. Girls are smart enough to figure out that if you won't do things like that for them when she's just your friend, you probably wouldn't do them if you were going out either.

My bf is a romantic I suppose but thats not to say that my other male friends arent. Its just that the thought never crossed my mind to become intimate with them in any way. But in truth it never really crossed my mind with this guy either.

Look plain and simple there is no clear cut way to determine whether you want to be with someone. There are guys who when you meet you know you are gonna be intimate with- guys who you know you are just gonna "be friends with" and guys who are some place in between there. To say to a guy "I think of you as a friend" isnt necessarily the kiss of death for an intimate relationship- it just means that shes thinking about it- so the only way to really tell if she considers you a friend is how she treats you. If you do all kinds of nice stuff for her and she never returns the favor, doesnt invite you over, hardly says thank you etc then chances are shes not interested in you like that. If she invites you over, makes you dinner, lets you study there when its too noisy at your place etc then chances are shes interested but she doesnt know if shes willing to risk her friendship- she needs more time.

As far as non-verbal cues are concerned. Guys sucks at getting them so I dont use them. I say what I want- I dont expect my guy to be "romantic" its a crock of crap anyway. I do expect him to be on time and to tell me that he loves me when he feels like it. I say what I want usually....

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"I ated the purple berries...they tasted like burning"

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<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >

for valentine's day, i'm goin all the way across the country to see my guy, and who knows what i might bring with me.

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kuru
'dancing is the vertical expression of horizontal desire.'
-robert frost

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Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot. The thing I hate most is that I didn't have a better idea.

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kuru
'dancing is the vertical expression of horizontal desire.'
-robert frost

quote:

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Originally posted by Rhydant:
oh no! its your appetite for SEX!

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that's pretty funny. i wonder if thats something you could leave somewhere. "crap, i forgot my appetite for sex at home. guess we'll just have to have a nice conversation, cause i dont really wanna do you."