Topic: I need help
started by: miNus
I'm a relative lam0r in this forum, but I've been reading alot. My real life has been kinda fahqed up lately. I've got this chick that I've been hanging out with, and I thought she liked me. Cool. I asked her out and she said she'd think about it. I guess her life is pretty fucked up too, so she didn't want to get into any relationships now. Ok. But I can't stop thinking about her. I don't know if she wants me to just give up or if she really wants me to try to get her. I guess I just need a chick's view on things right now. Any help guys?
EDIT: When I say I can't stop thinking about her, I mean whenever I'm not with her, I feel like I'm half empty. I don't mean that I just want her physically. I've never been in love, but I think I am. That's what makes this so hard.
Thx
Minus
This message has been edited by miNus on March 23, 2001 at 08:39 PM
--Kintara
quote:
Originally posted by Kintara:
...if she says "Ill think about it..." again, tell her what you just said to us and ask for a direct answer.
*\%*#\%@* !!!
Don't be fooled! The second you tell her what you just told us - asking for a fucking direct answer, to boot - is the same exact second you lose ALL possibility to hook up with her. Dear God, man. This is not the movies. You are not Prince Charming.
Here’s a better solution: act like you don't care. In fact, make sure she sees you around other girls. The more she feels that you are unattainable the more attractive you will appear. It helps if you outwit/outperform her boyfriend in some way that discredits his reputation (you beat the self-titled "card shark" at nine straight hands of poker, for example). Be a bit of an asshole, but still light-hearted and humorous. Make her smile. Do not compliment her. If you hug her, don’t let go first. If you talk to her on the phone, hang up first. Don’t buy her anything. Don’t make her trinkets, and most of all – no poetry.
quote:
...ask for a direct answer.
Oh, and no ultimatums either.
edit: i fucked it up.
This message has been edited by whiskey@throttle on March 24, 2001 at 02:24 AM
Whatever...
but whether you approve of it or not, that’s the way it works.
quote:
Originally posted by miNus:
*snip*she didn't want to get into any relationships now.*snip*I don't mean that I just want her physically
1) I don't want to just "hook up" with her.
2) She doesn't have a boyfriend now.
3) I don't want to play mind games.
EDIT: I think I figured out what I am going to do. Next time I see her, I'm going to bring her aside and explain to her how I feel. Then at least she'll know, and if she still doesn't want a relationship, I'll just leave her alone.
thx
miNus
This message has been edited by miNus on March 24, 2001 at 05:17 AM
And of course be prepared, cause it's VERY possible that she could say no. I'm going 50/50 on this one. It's pretty damn close, but you really don't have a better option at this point.
Keep us informed, and DON'T put it off! 
------------------
<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >
Of course, most of us are losers, too. So don't take any of this shit as the Bible. Take her personality into account, you're the only one who can judge that.
------------------
"You've soiled my dickey!"
--Kintara
quote:
Originally posted by miNus:
I don't mean that I just want her physically. I've never been in love, but I think I am. That's what makes this so hard.
i feel j00r pain, grasshoppa. unfortunatly, i cant help
------------------
...when you look long into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
Maybe = No, but I don't want to make you feel bad. Also, as a female, I subconsciously crave attention, and now that you've just displayed your desire and affection for me I know I have the upper hand. I find it flattering, so I'll keep the answer gray and watch you grovel at my feet. It feels good to know guys like me.
Oh, and another thing: if you give her an ultimatum and put her on the spot to answer a question that generally requires some degree of time and extended thought to answer...I PROMISE the answer will always be "no." That's a golden rule...the "maybe" forced into a definitive answer will turn into, "it's not that I don't like you..."
You can't go up to a girl and say, "tell me now! I'm in love with you and want an answer now!" That shit doesn't work, and you'll only wind up making her feel uncomfortable. It's as if you don't respect her judgement and feelings, and it also makes you look like an impatient stalker.
Whether you like "mind games" or not, love is a game and you use your brain to play it. You have a choice as to whether you want to get with it and win, or play by your own rules and fail miserably.
Remember, you want to appear both mysterious and important...carry that cool confidence about you when you flirt with her, but still remain distant. Don't hang out with her every chance you get. Make her want to come to you. Make her want to "figure you out." That's all.
I assure you will see results. In fact, there's no doubt in my mind.
Go Whiskey! But I'll add this... IF she says, "It's not that I don't like you," say, "Good! So lets go out! " Chicks dig that for some reason... oh and don't use the word, "LOVE," but let you feeling be know.
------------------
<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >
quote:
Originally posted by PersonGuy:
IF she says, "It's not that I don't like you," say, "Good! So lets go out!
does this work?!?!?!?!?
thx alot for the input guys
I'm gonna sit down and explain my situation to her.
oh and btw, I'll shut up about her now
-miNus
This message has been edited by miNus on March 25, 2001 at 06:56 PM
Throwing it out to somebody else is difficult because you don't know how they're going to take it. If they want you, they will find it endearing and it will help. If they don't or are even hedging, then it will scare the crap out of them.
Everybody takes it differently, so it's best to keep it out of the conversation altogether.
quote:
Originally posted by PersonGuy:
"If the answer is 'NO', just flat out tell me! I can handle the truth. But please no more 'MAYBES', I need a definative answer from you."
I get this mental picture of PG saying this to a girl while shaking the shit out of her and slaping her at the end...
------------------
Any sentance that ends with ANAL SEX is worth taking another look at.
http://www.technicalvirgin.com/
Read "their message"
Nothing against the 'L' word once you're going out and all, but you can't just walk up to any and say it and expect a positive reponse. I mean, sure... be sensitive, but don't be CREEPY! I wouldn't even use it as a last resort, it's like trying to chuck a nuclear grenade and then trying to run out of the blast area (even though that's a sucky analogy... I just thought it sounded cool).
------------------
<P:\>erson\Guy.exe -PersonGuy *pERSONgUY.cfg
< http://www.personguy.com >