Topic: hey baby, what's your sign?
started by: BlackFlag
Posted by BlackFlag on Jul. 10 2002,22:27
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb 18) - You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a jerk.PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20) - You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have a minor influence on your friends, and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are a general dips***.
ARIES (Mar 21-Apr 20) - You are the pioneer type and think most people are quick-tempered, impatient, and scornful of advice. You too are a jerk.
TAURUS (Apr 21-May 20) - You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded.
GEMINI (May 21-Jun 20) - You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard.
CANCER (Jun 21-Jul 22) - You are sympathetic and understanding to other peoples problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a s***. Everybody in prison is a Cancer.
LEO (Jul 23-Aug 22) - You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you're an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieves and spend most of their lives kissing mirrors.
VIRGO (Aug 23-Sep 22) - You are the logical type and hate disorder. This nitpicking is sickening to your friends. You are cold and unemotional. Virgos make good bus drivers and pimps.
LIBRA (Sep 23-Oct 22) - You are the artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. If you are male, you are probably gay. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras die of venereal disease.
SCORPIO (Oct 23-Nov 21) - The worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are a perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are murdered.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22-Dec 21) - You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarius' are drunks. You are not worth the time of day.
CAPRICORN (Dec 22-Jan 19) - You are conservative and are afraid of taking risks. You are basically a chickens***. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.
Posted by Bob_the_Cannibal on Jul. 10 2002,23:10
um.......wow...
That was depressing...
Posted by demonk on Jul. 10 2002,23:16
Thanks for calling me a jerk, you jerk! 
Posted by Bozeman on Jul. 11 2002,00:35
Isn't that form Adam Sandler?
Posted by WillyPete on Jul. 11 2002,01:44
| Quote (Bozeman @ 10 July 2002,16:35) |
| Isn't that form Adam Sandler? |
What the itchy burning sensation?
Nah, that's from Elton John and a troupe of performing dobermans.
Posted by forumwhore on Jul. 11 2002,02:05
I saw it once in a dirty magazine.Know that more Presidents have been Scorpios than any other sign?
I'm not too thrilled with that, Presidents rarely impress me these days...
Posted by Bob_the_Cannibal on Jul. 11 2002,08:01
| Quote |
| LEO (Jul 23-Aug 22) - You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you're an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieves and spend most of their lives kissing mirrors. |
hah, that's my father, to a T. he's a leo, and he's exactly like that.
me? I'm a scorpio. And I am a shrewd buisnessman.
When I loan someone a dollar, I charge a dollar/week for interest.
| Quote |
| AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb 18) - You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a jerk. |
my sister. perfectly. she's a pathological liar she's dumb.
nobody who actually knows her, likes her.
Posted by compact3000 on Jul. 11 2002,14:23
| Quote (BlackFlag @ 10 July 2002,17:27) |
| AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb 18) - You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a jerk. |
Yup! That just about sums it up for me!
Posted by TheTaxMan on Jul. 11 2002,17:18
| Quote (BlackFlag @ 10 July 2002,14:27) |
| SCORPIO (Oct 23-Nov 21) - The worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are a perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are murdered. |
Just to spite these people:
I don't like getting involved with any kind of buisness transaction, be it lending money to someone or a hostile takeover. I will never achieve the pinnacle of success because I am too ethical. Some people did call me a "som' bitch'" once, although I think it had something to do with their own insecurities about a lifestyle that ended (or should have) some time in the 1960's.
Posted by forumwhore on Jul. 11 2002,20:12
What is up with this?cr0,
forumwhore,
TaxMan,
BtC,
Viestran,
Anztac,
caseman984
Incubus,
ic0n0, etc
I believe are all Scorpios...
I think I'm missing one or two too.
How odd.
Posted by Beldurin on Jul. 11 2002,20:45
aries...yes I am a jerk
Posted by Mhoraigh on Jul. 11 2002,21:04
Hmm... most Scorpios are murdered eh? I would suspect it would be by a spurned lover - they're as shrewd in relationships as in business (ducking projectiles)... of course they also tend to have the most sex appeal....me, I'm a sag.... and I don't drink very often because I somewhat agree with that horoscope - and I don't want to be a drunk. though the lack of talent thing I have to argue...
ok I'm babbling, I'll shut up now.
Posted by RadioActive on Jul. 11 2002,21:26
| Quote (BlackFlag @ 10 July 2002,17:27) |
| CANCER (Jun 21-Jul 22) - You are sympathetic and understanding to other peoples problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. |
that is dead on for me. the rest is just a load of crap to make it a bit more harsh. i know i won't end up on wellfare, but besides that it's pretty damn true.
Posted by Rhydant on Jul. 12 2002,02:10
| Quote (BlackFlag @ 10 July 2002,06:27) |
| CAPRICORN (Dec 22-Jan 19) - You are conservative and are afraid of taking risks. You are basically a chickens***. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself. |
hehhehe, its true.
Posted by humanoid on Jul. 12 2002,18:33
i'm a virgo, so...on one hand i could be a bus driver, on the other a pimp.
decisions, decisions.
Posted by Nikita on Jul. 12 2002,19:17
| Quote (humanoid @ 12 July 2002,13:33) |
| on one hand i could be a bus driver, on the other a pimp. |
how about a pimpin' bus driver?
you could make a fortune shuttling/pimping catholic school girls around!