Topic: You are a Photographer. Don't do this.
started by: editor
Posted by editor on Mar. 12 2002,02:24
You are a professional. So when you're done taking the model's pictures, do not ask if she'll pose < nude. >She may even grow < comfortable with you. >
Make lots of eye contact, don't stare at her body, especially when she starts to get < excited! >
If she asks you if you have any ropes, say < you don't have more than one. >
Ask her several times if she really has a boyfriend, a sure sign of a pro in moral < distress >
You know better, but you get a little steamed under the collar anyways. Then she asks you if you would mind tying her up for real the < next time. >
Never ever let yourself be alone with a nude girl who gets turned on taking pictures! Bad photographer! Bad! Now go and post as fast as you can!
the rope pix are about 2 hours old...she's still on her way home....this is really frustrating! Never shoot nudes of anyone attractive to you. You won't sleep.
Posted by Uberkommando on Mar. 12 2002,02:34
Thank you, editor. You have made my day oh-so-much better.Yowza.
Posted by Anztac on Mar. 12 2002,02:35
....You have such a great job........
Posted by Bob_the_Cannibal on Mar. 12 2002,02:42
aah! damn it, I'm taking photography next semester. fuck IT, I'm going to be a photographer!
Posted by editor on Mar. 12 2002,02:50
In the last picture you can see the clock top left. It's been less than 3 hours. I asked her, she's going to "see" her b/f tonight.
I on the other hand, I have detnet...
/me loves detnet, but it can't provide what the hormones want...
I will make it a mission to provide a detgirl from LA for our (my) amusement! Garrr! Urrgh!
/crosses legs and uncrosses them...
the interesting thing is that there were 7 more rolls of film shot x 36 exposures...can't wait to see those! Remember, I wasn't posing her, she was. "can I shoot with that rope" "do you mind (?) if I take my shirt off?" g r o a n
Posted by Spydir on Mar. 12 2002,02:56
if you didn't have such a great job I'd hate you for having such a great job.edit: 12 more posts to 1000!
Posted by editor on Mar. 12 2002,02:59
err, if you get a thousand, are you supposed to get something? I left the detnet instructions down in the car...PS you can click on the pix and make them....b b b bigger! Shutup Beavis! No, you Butthead! heh heh hehehheheh
Here, have
< another. >
Posted by Uberkommando on Mar. 12 2002,03:05
| Quote (Spydir @ 11 Mar. 2002,20:56) |
| edit: 12 more posts to 1000! |
982 + 12 = 994. Eightteen more, perhaps?
Those pics make me happy, anyways. She looks a lot like this really hot girl I never managed to get with. At least now I know what I missed. *Sob*
Posted by editor on Mar. 12 2002,03:07
Mr. Spydir, you are *so* busted!!! LOL LOL LOL When you get a grand, I'll send you a math textbook. Nyeah
Mayhaps you were distracted by thinking about < this. >
Or just maybe perhaps
< this! last one. >
Posted by Bob_the_Cannibal on Mar. 12 2002,05:37
what I wouldn't give to be that piano, or that couch at that moment...
Posted by CatKnight on Mar. 12 2002,05:43
6 more 
Posted by LiNeY on Mar. 12 2002,14:49
As for me, the really interesting thing in those pics is the piano... what I wouldn't give to play such an old piano...Editor, would you shoot me posing with that piano?
Posted by Wolfguard on Mar. 12 2002,15:20
Nice.Next time take her out to dinner first and get some meat on those ribs.
Other than that very nice.
Posted by Wiley on Mar. 12 2002,15:32
Ed, you da man!!! You have both the most rewarding and fustrating of all jobs. I don't think I would've had the will power to stay profesional though. I have this rule when it comes to naked girls making suggestive comments in my presence, do me now or at least get me some tissue and help with the clean up. 
Posted by DuSTman on Mar. 12 2002,17:01
If that was me, there's no way I would have remained conscious long enough to take the photos.
Posted by editor on Mar. 12 2002,18:40
well....maybe the trick is that I don't do what you think I do with the pictures....it would be too weird! LiNey, you make it to LA and I'll shoot you six ways from Sunday on the piano!
How dare you all want < more! >
Posted by solid on Mar. 12 2002,19:18
Woah I'd need to apply 5 lbs of anti-perspirant to be able to keep my cool taking photos like that...
Posted by gee ess on Mar. 12 2002,21:35
Hmmm. Does nude girl know her pix are so easily viewed on the internet? Maybe she doesn't care. Or doesn't know. Yet.Is it just me or are her eyes a little...vacant.
I'm with Liney on the piano. It's...lovely. Looks antique. And...it's not giving me the old "deer caught in the headlights" vibe.
I'm glad the boys are happy. But what's with the cheesy hooker shoes?
Posted by Uberkommando on Mar. 12 2002,22:02
Begone! Thy attempts to criticise this pinnacle of human physique are borne out of vanity! This woman is a goddess!
Posted by gee ess on Mar. 12 2002,22:08
| Quote |
| Thy attempts to criticise this pinnacle of human physique are borne out of vanity! This woman is a goddess! |
Never said she wasn't lovely. She just looks a little "lights on but no one's home"...and the outside IS just the shell.
And, no...not vanity. I'm not attempting to make myself look better by criticising her. Just an observation. So please continue drooling and don't mind me.
Posted by editor on Mar. 12 2002,22:51
It just don't get better. Not only did she give permission, I told her she could change her mind later if she thought it too much! And I gave her this site's name too. She hasn't called me yet.LOOKITTHAT! Below! It's Incubus!
Posted by incubus on Mar. 13 2002,00:55
Kevin, baby, she wants your hot salami! You know it!
Posted by kuru on Mar. 13 2002,04:06
Maybe the reason for the hooker boots and the vacant 'Mall's open and nobody's shopping' look is that basically she did a bunch of porn.And maybe the reason that like gee ess I'm not impressed is that it doesn't actually take any talent to be female, naked and act horny.
*shrug*
Posted by ic0n0 on Mar. 13 2002,04:18
Does it take skill to seduce a male? No! It doesn’t matter if there wasn’t much effort men like it easy and with no questions asked. By the way FAP! FAP! FAP!
Posted by Uberkommando on Mar. 13 2002,04:22
Yeah, just like it doesn't take any talent to be hyperbolically critical and *not* pose naked for our entertainment.Edit: Re kuru (Damn you icono! )
Posted by kuru on Mar. 13 2002,04:51
So you have a problem with me because I criticize chicks who have nothing other than their nakedness going for them and because I won't put up naked pictures of myself.Damned if I do, damned if I don't.
Since there's nothing I can possibly do that won't cause you to rail away at me, I'm just going to keep being who I am, a real person who doesn't exist on this board simply to do what you want.
Posted by liquid metal on Mar. 13 2002,05:28
looks aren't everything. look at that one snickers commercial. the one w/ the guy helping the old lady across teh street. at one pt she was probably a hootch but now she's old. or she could have always been ugly but been a great person to be around.
Posted by j0eSmith on Mar. 13 2002,06:29
| Quote (liquid metal @ 12 Mar. 2002,21:28) |
| looks aren't everything. look at that one snickers commercial. the one w/ the guy helping the old lady across teh street. at one pt she was probably a hootch but now she's old. or she could have always been ugly but been a great person to be around. |
What are you, drunk?
Seriously.
Actually, that sounds pretty good about now.. Know what else sounds good? Some sweet buds. Yeah. Got a new bowl to try out.
Also, the chick is hot, mostly cause she's naked, but still hot. $5 says kb has seen a naked chick most recently out of all of us.
Posted by LiNeY on Mar. 13 2002,11:01
| Quote (kuru @ 12 Mar. 2002,20:06) |
| And maybe the reason that like gee ess I'm not impressed is that it doesn't actually take any talent to be female, naked and act horny. |
I'm with you on that. And I'm not impressed either.
Posted by LiNeY on Mar. 13 2002,11:02
| Quote (ic0n0 @ 12 Mar. 2002,20:18) |
| Does it take skill to seduce a male? |
Yes. If it doesn't, the guy is totally desperate, and not worth the inexisting effort.
Posted by Necromancer on Mar. 13 2002,11:53
Yes Kuru has a point......hands up who cares either way
Posted by WillyPete on Mar. 13 2002,11:54
2 hours. You shoot on digital or have a home processing lab?Pretty quick.
Posted by Wiley on Mar. 13 2002,17:28
| Quote (ic0n0 @ 12 Mar. 2002,20:18) |
| Does it take skill to seduce a male? |
Hell yeah it does. A chick has to have the following skills;
1. Be able to suck start a leaf blower
2. Put both her legs behind her head
3. Be able to mix some good cocktails
4. Walk in really high heels
5. Keep herself entertained when I want to sleep after sex
6. Earn enough to support me in the manner to which I have become accustomed
7. Look good naked
8. Not sue me for being a sexist pig
Posted by Carnivore on Mar. 13 2002,18:36
| Quote (kuru @ 12 Mar. 2002,20:06) |
| Maybe the reason for the hooker boots and the vacant 'Mall's open and nobody's shopping' look is that basically she did a bunch of porn. And maybe the reason that like gee ess I'm not impressed is that it doesn't actually take any talent to be female, naked and act horny. *shrug* |
Hehe she said hooker boots. Just because someone keeps their body somewhat fit and isnt camera shy doesnt make them talented. It just shows her lifestyle isnt about pigging out on food all the time and bitching about people who keep themselves in shape.
Posted by ic0n0 on Mar. 13 2002,18:40
Maybe I am just desperate Or lonely or both.
Posted by kuru on Mar. 13 2002,19:54
| Quote (Carnivore @ 13 Mar. 2002,13:36) | ||
 6-->
Hehe she said hooker boots. Just because someone keeps their body somewhat fit and isnt camera shy doesnt make them talented. It just shows her lifestyle isnt about pigging out on food all the time and bitching about people who keep themselves in shape. |
And my lifestyle is about 'pigging out on food all the time?'
Well?
Posted by veistran on Mar. 13 2002,20:57
| Quote (LiNeY @ 13 Mar. 2002,03:02) | ||
Yes. If it doesn't, the guy is totally desperate, and not worth the inexisting effort. |
Show up naked and with a six pack and you've just seduced any non-gay male.
Posted by Bob_the_Cannibal on Mar. 13 2002,23:12
careful how you answer, carnivore, she's got enough weapons at home to invade Russia and it's ex-soviet bloc counterparts...
Posted by editor on Mar. 14 2002,20:24
She's asked me to remind everyone that she already has a degree and is working on another....and she has big eyes, which can look vacant, her words, but she's really there. Here. Anyways, she's asked me to take them down now that we've had our fun! Ok.
Posted by Carnivore on Mar. 14 2002,22:22
| Quote (kuru @ 13 Mar. 2002,11:54) | ||||
And my lifestyle is about 'pigging out on food all the time?' Well? |
As long as you keep saying every nude chic who gets posted here is a hooker and/or has no talent I will keep saying what I think. You say what you say and I will say what I see.
Posted by editor on Mar. 15 2002,02:50
/ed quiet
Posted by WrineX on Mar. 15 2002,22:54
| Quote (editor @ 14 Mar. 2002,18:50) |
| /ed quiet |
That would be something new
Posted by editor on Mar. 16 2002,00:00
Yah, well, I'm sitting here while another photographer sets up to use my studio, and I have nothing to do *but* post....You may be happy to know I'm posting on another forum too, I might even invite a couple of them over here for a guest appearance or two...
I hereby grant you special dispensation to double-post for an entire week, no penalty.
Posted by Uberkommando on Mar. 16 2002,01:05
Woo hoo!
Posted by Uberkommando on Mar. 16 2002,01:05
Woo hoo!
Posted by kuru on Mar. 16 2002,03:05
Bring it on, Carnivore.Show me just how much effort you'll go to defending chicks you'll never meet just because they appeared naked on a website.