The comical possibilities are endless...For eg.
Driving a car is very much like making love to a beautiful woman.
Before you start it up you've got to check the oil to make sure you wont overheat her engine.
Before inserting your key into the ignition you've got to switch on the electrics by pressing the button marked Clitoris. Refer to users manual to loacte this as it is sometimes well hidden and hard to find.
Next insert your key, turn her on starting by keeping the revs low so that the oil in the engine has time to fully lubricate.
Then simply shift into gear and poot your foot down until you reach your destination, making sure to change gear so that the engine can handle the various changes in speed.
When going on a long ride you've got to make sure you have enough petrol in your tank so you dont run out half way there. If this does happen your woman may have to resort to syphoning petrol out of another mans tank.
In the event of an emergency your car will deploy both of it's passenger and drivers side airbags to cushion your face from impact.
After many years of mileage you'll start to find that your car gets a little worse for wear and doesnt perform as well as she used to. In this situation it's time to go out and get a more younger sexier model that has new features that your old car wasnt capable of, such as speed shift gearbox, four wheel drive and is easier to slip into reverse without any complaints due to the more efficeint exhaust and rasied, more firm bumper. However of course these newer models will require more money to own and keep running.
And remember at all times make sure you strap on your safety belt cos you'll never know what you might run into.
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Random giberish etc. etc.
