|
|
| Post Number: 1
|
L33T_h4x0r_d00d 
IT terrorist
Group: Members
Posts: 1203
Joined: Sep. 2000
|
 |
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,14:59 |
|
   |
Last night I'm at home with some of my friends. They are in my back yard looking at my bike, Im standing in the middle of my deck. I was attempting to fill butane (the bastard gas) brazing torch/soldering iron with out much luck. The little nozzle on the refill tank isnt seating very well and is spray alot of butane out around the edges. So my dick head neighbors come out on thier deck with a case of budweisers.
Now theres some serious issues between us and them. Their dog shits all over our front yard and used to in the back untill we put a fence up. We have assigned parking, 2 spots per house, their friends are always parking in our shit "on accident". The dumb fucker was puking in his toilet and passed out, the toilet overflows and fills his bathroom with 3 inches of water before coming through the comon wall and into our basement.
So Im trying to fill this damn torch just ignoring them. Then shit turns bad. Theres a sound I can only describe as a "fwoop" and a large ball of orange fire about 4.5 feet in diameter wrapped around me. I completly froze with my head turned to the side. It only lasted a second or two and I look down to see the lit cigarette that one of the assholes next door flicked at me. I hopped the short fence between our decks and hit the fucker I suspected in the head with his own deck chair about 8 times. His friends run up, my friends run up, theres alot of shit talking and we go back to our deck. I have no hair on my arms past my elbow and I had to trim off some of the curly cue'ed eyebrow hairs so I didnt look diseased. That shirt is scorched, and the big summer umbrella on the deck has a little black spot in the fabric now.
WTF?
--------------
This game is so boring it wouldn't be fun if you were somehow playing it while bungee jumping into a Chuck E. Cheese's full of nude ninja girls fighting the Predator. -seanbaby
|
 |
|
|
| Post Number: 2
|
jim
Asshole
Group: Members
Posts: 1208
Joined: May 2000
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,15:35 |
|
 |
lol 
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 3
|
Crafty Butcher
My legs! My legs! I can't feel my legs
Group: Members
Posts: 100
Joined: Nov. 2000
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,15:46 |
|
|
the problem is that if i'd seen that happen you would have had to have given me large quantities of very strong muscle relaxant to get me to stop laughing. now your neighbours sound as if they're the sort of ppl who have the 'that'd be funny' thought, and then either through idiocy or due to repressed homicidal tendencies, the error-checking protocol that's supposed to override that thought with something like 'that'd be so dumb, you could so easily kill the bloke' just never kicks in. sadly in my experience the only thing to do with such ppl is sterilisation and hope the gene pool tries harder next itme. basically they're never going to stop being wankers. either move, or stop caring. neither of those are remotely easy obviously, but that the problem with being a rational human being these days: everybody else is a cunt.
--------------
even if his brain wasn't mush - which it is - he chewed out his own tongue a long time ago
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 4
|
DRUFER
bleh.
Group: Members
Posts: 100
Joined: Aug. 2001
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,15:50 |
|
|
...could always use the torch on their car they next time they park in your spot.
--------------
I need a new sig.
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 5
|
L33T_h4x0r_d00d
IT terrorist
Group: Members
Posts: 1203
Joined: Sep. 2000
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,16:00 |
|
|
| Quote (DRUFER @ 18 July 2002,07:50) | | ...could always use the torch on their car they next time they park in your spot. |
Fuck that, $1.99 buys a quart of dot 3 brake fluid. A $0.32 bic pen pokes a nice round hole in the bottom. 30 seconds and the above supplies ensures that paint never sticks to his car again. Extra points for leaving a word or phrase.
--------------
This game is so boring it wouldn't be fun if you were somehow playing it while bungee jumping into a Chuck E. Cheese's full of nude ninja girls fighting the Predator. -seanbaby
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 6
|
DRUFER
bleh.
Group: Members
Posts: 100
Joined: Aug. 2001
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,16:15 |
|
|
 works for me
--------------
I need a new sig.
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 7
|
Necromancer
Ace Rimmer
Group: Members
Posts: 419
Joined: Feb. 2002
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,16:34 |
|
|
m8 you have some fucked up neighbours not that you dont already know that.
that bastard got everythign he deserved. i'm only mad you didnt have a handy wrench to hand to cave his face in.
--------------
There'll be time for explanations later... and hopefully, some sex
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 8
|
Dysorderia
Kryten 2X4B 523P
Group: Members
Posts: 1061
Joined: Jul. 2000
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,17:07 |
|
|
| Quote (L33T_h4x0r_d00d @ 18 July 2002,11:00) | | Quote (DRUFER @ 18 July 2002,07:50) | | ...could always use the torch on their car they next time they park in your spot. |
Fuck that, $1.99 buys a quart of dot 3 brake fluid. A $0.32 bic pen pokes a nice round hole in the bottom. 30 seconds and the above supplies ensures that paint never sticks to his car again. Extra points for leaving a word or phrase. |
or you could try pouring equal parts of pool chlorine and acid(both are available at your local pool store) into his car's air intake(creates a very noxious gas).
try this only if you know he won't call the cops.
--------------
Sir? May I recommend I load myself into the reverse-thrust tubes and you use my body as decoy-fodder? This will, of course leave me splattered across deep space and unable to complete today's laundry, for which I apologise in advance.
[url=http://www.kr1cket.com]www.kr1cket.com[/url]
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 9
|
Crafty Butcher
My legs! My legs! I can't feel my legs
Group: Members
Posts: 100
Joined: Nov. 2000
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,17:15 |
|
|
back in 'the day', when getting hold of a copy of the Anarchist's Cookbook, was enough to give me wet dreams, i remember it recommended getting a thermite reaction (aluminium oxide + iron fillings lit with magnesium) going on someone's bonnet as this would melt through engine block/axle/pavement. anyone ever try it? if not LHD could do some research for us...
--------------
even if his brain wasn't mush - which it is - he chewed out his own tongue a long time ago
|
|
|
|
| Post Number: 10
|
forumwhore
Fear Me, I Am Change.
Group: Members
Posts: 3282
Joined: Dec. 2001
|
|
Posted on: Jul. 18 2002,17:26 |
|
|
Once, I did a bad thing; kay, twice.
I put drywall screws into all four tires, just turned enough to
seat them.
Please drive the vehicle now....
Barring that, cutting the brake lines is too easy.
Leave the parking brake so as not to kill innocent ppl.
--------------
Posting from; El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de Los Angeles de Porciuncula
|
|
|
|
|
|
